Hailstorm in the summertime

We don’t go anywhere and things can get boring up here. We’re totally like Rapunzel but at least we have each other. Okay but she did have that gecko. That thing was cute. I’ll never get tired of the view though. There are a ton of birds and crows up here. I wish I could fly. I think about that every day. But a view doesn’t do much. Ya there’s a lake and it’s all blue and crystall-y and I can see far out, but the fun buildings are too far away. Ours is the only tall one around. That’s the tower vibe. They’re always climbing out the window in American movies. I mean Rapunzel let down her hair and all. Not sure if it’s viable. Not cuz of the building, it’s only 9 stories. But I can’t get myself through the bars on the windows. I hate those bars on the window so much. WE ARE NOT PRISONERS. Well, so we are. If I have to hear about how much fun Shree and them had at the mall the other day one more time, I will shoot myself in the head. It’s so unfair. I’ve tried to shove my head through the biggest square, but not my shoulders. It’d be awesome if I could just contract my shoulders like a cat can. That’s something I found out yesterday. And then go down the pipes. The building is sooo scalable. It’s literally wrapped in pipes and jutting out window ledges, and balconies. Nine floors ain’t shit. One day I’m going to squeeze myself through those bars. I gotta go on the side with that nasty muddy field below though, because it’s outside the wall. The wall around our building looks super tiny from up here, but I know for a fact it’s high AF and all covered with slimy green vines and shit and no way I’m touching that. The muddy field is right under our balcony. Ferret One and I have come up with the funniest game. Sometimes a bunch of dudes come play soccer or something in the field, and we can hear them hooting and hollering from all the way up here. It pisses us off, like wtf. All the noise they make is just boasting that they’re allowed out and we’re not. So screw em. First we stick our faces through the grills on the balcony and shout down at them. And then we call them all kinds of names. But they can’t really hear us so we start grabbing things and throwing them. This is a delicate science. It has to be small and heavy. Small enough to get through the gaps between the grills, and heavy enough to plunge straight down. Paper balls just float by. We had to get super creative. We can’t just chuck things that are miss-able, like pens or board game pieces. Ferret Two threw two dead batteries then got bored and left. Ferret One and I are determined young persons. We turned the house upside down looking for ammo. It was me though, my bright idea to go through the fridge and stuff, and it struck me out of nowhere. Ice cubes! Holy shit it’s the perfect thing. Nobody will miss ice cubes and they go through the gaps perfectly. Also, ice falling out of the sky? Totally viable. No trace left of the weapon. I fear I may be a genius. Ferret One and I went at it. It was so funny. We’ve read all the books in the house and we’ve played all the games, so obviously it’s time to level up. We have to get a few steps back from the balcony to get our arms to swing. It’s all about practice. A really good throw is one that sails right through the gap without touching and kinda arcs through the air and falls right in the middle of their stupid game. Most of the dudes are further away from our building so dropping it straight down is a waste of good ammo. When we miss, the ice cube hits the grill and literally explodes all over the floor. It’s freaking loud. We don’t need the maid or somebody coming over and poking their noses in. Those guys were CONFUSED. They kept shouting, like why is there ice coming down from the sky? Ferret One and I crouch behind a chair and we laugh and laugh at them. Serves them right for having fun. But they did realize where it was coming from. They yelled at us to come down. Oh hell nah. Now that would be stupid. And they kept saying it. But they didn’t sound angry which might make it scarier. You know it is in this stupid country and men attacking women all the time. It’s like Ms. Deb said, cows have more rights than women in this country. We were absolutely not going to go down there and face them, we stay up in our tower and throw ice cubes down at the populace. Iconic. And those ice cubes are hefty. The maid did yell at us though, like you could really hurt them if you hit them! But we didn’t hit any of them! They were too far apart and our team was only so small. Plus we ran out of ice cubes almost immediately. I legit had to sit on my hands for a while cuz they were all numb and frozen. And now we’re back to being bored. Ma, that horrid woman has locked up all the computers and the tablet too. She won’t be back from the lab till at least like 7 or 8pm. Ugh why does my life suck.

Ferret Two said we might go over to grandma’s house in a bit so that’s good. I hope they have ice cream.